How do you say "Do your fucking dishes" in a nice way?

I don't think there's a nice way to do it... but by god, i've tried. I understand a few things about myself. Like the fact that a lot of what I try to say doesn't come across the way I want to say it. And the fact that I have a few pet peeves when it comes to living in the same house with someone else (I've worked hard for everything I have and want to take care of it).

So the other night when I came back from New Orleans, the house was a wreck. And not at all the way I left it when I left a few days earlier. Something had clearly blown up in the microwave. Dishes were everywhere. The bathroom was filthy. I wasn't feeling so good so I just went to sleep. I woke up with the full-blown flu and the house still in the same disarray.

Thursday night, I was feeling a little better, so I at least cleaned the kitchen. I'm not one of these people who cleans up after someone and expects them to get that I would have rather them have cleaned up after themself. I ask them to do it so they know that's something they should be doing.

Wait. Isn't that something YOUR MOTHER is supposed to teach you? (again, I agree with the philosophy of parenting licenses) I digress.

So here I am. Thursday night. Just cleaned the kitchen and I'm still sick. Wake up Friday morning to find 2 glasses in the sink. FUCK. Are you fucking kidding me? The dishwasher is practically attached to the sink, it's so close. Is he that fucking lazy that he can't just put it in there?

(woah. Sorry for all the Fuck's. I'm pretty heated over this stupid bullshit)

So I send him a text and watch my words. He's told me before that he's "sensitive" so I've been REALLY cautious about what I say to him.

My text says "Hey, I spent a lot of time cleaning the kitchen last night. Do you think you could help me out by putting your things in the dishwasher? That would really help. Hope you have a great day"

That's a nice text, right? I asked VERY nicely for him to just start putting his dishes in the dishwasher. He responded "sure, I'll help you keep it clean". Great! So last night, he comes home... goes straight to his room. Comes in the kitchen gets something, goes back to his room. etc.

I get up this morning. Dishes are SILL THERE. So I send him a text "Ok well I guess I'll do your dishes because you clearly have passed them by several times."

Ugh. So now he's home and he called me a bitch and said he literally stopped caring about me a month ago. Haha. Wow. There really is no right way to say "do your dishes" or "use the right setting on the washing machine" without a "senistive" (whom I think is gay) person getting upset about it.

Thank GOD he's going to be gone in a few weeks.

So... did I do the right thing? What else was there for me to do?

Appropriately,

Do the dishes!
Faites la vaisselle!